The very definition of awesome

Friday, May 15, 2009

Things at work have been so hectic lately that I've felt crappy pretty much every moment that I'm not at home. Home has been my solitude through all this chaos. And I have only R to thank for that.

When my day is bad she will do whatever she can to make me feel better. Take Wednesday for example. I was having a totally shitty day. R tells me mid-afternoon that she's leaving work an hour early to run an errand. She won't give me any details. However, she does show up at my office about 20 minutes later with Starbucks for me. And just like that all the tension that was causing me to bubble over retreated. I was still stressed but that one great gesture knocked my anxiety level down somewhere near manageable.

Then today she tells me she is taking a day off. I'm getting ready for work and she stumbles into the living room still half asleep and proclaims that she is going to clean the house while she is off.

And the best part??? She starts cleaning then and there!!!!!! If I had been more awake or had an ounce of grace I would have swooned.

I plan on doing something incredibly nice for her as soon as I have the brain power to think it up.

So to sum it all up my definition of awesome=R.

Name calling

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Yeah, I know I said in the last post that my very next post would be some riveting story about how I decided to incur tens of thousands of dollars MORE in student loan debt. But, I lied. Hey, at least I'm an honest liar. I mean, a liar who tells the truth. I mean an honest person who occasionally lies.

Wait, what was the question again?

Seriously, I don't want to talk about that because I am way too superstitious and when things become more set in stone I will write that post.

But, for now. Is is normal to spend your whole lunch thinking of new insults to trade back and forth with your partner? Cause R & I do that all the time. We never call each other anything in meanness; always in jest. My personal all time favorite is and will always be ass hair. My most ridiculous one? Serpent.

I don't think we're abnormal, per say. But, I do think we're lucky we're together because no one else would probably know what to do with us and our weird sense of humor.

The very best

Thursday, September 11, 2008

I've been so busy and stressed that I haven't really had time to sit down and write the post I've had in the back of my head for a while.

Over Labor Day weekend R & I celebrated our 8th anniversary. 8 wonderful years.

Before R & I got together I've never had a relationship last more than a year (2 years if you can count the on and off periods). I honestly thought long term relationships weren't for me as I couldn't understand how you could be with the same person for so long and not get bored. I used to be a very fickle person and that bad personality trait always seemed to manifest itself in my relationships. And then I met R. And let me say WOW.

I haven't had a fickle moment since I met her. I never had those doubts. I never looked just to keep my options open. I never sat and wondered if there was someone else out there who was better for me. I guess I instinctively knew that there wasn't someone better. I finally found the right one. I finally found the one person I was meant to be with. I could stop looking and worrying and just breathe.

Everything in my relationship with R is so completely and totally different than every other relationship I have ever had. Not only do I love R; I truly like her. I like being with her and around her and I enjoy all the time we spend together. Sometimes we stop and ask each other if we're normal in our need and want to spend all our time together. We look at other couples and don't see that. We don't go out with our friends separately. Not because the other would get mad or upset but because we WANT to be with each other. We don't do things separately very often. If one of us needs alone time or space we just retreat a bit; to another room, to a separate activity, etc. Yes, sometimes we wonder if we're normal but really neither of us mind.

She's my best friend. Whenever I have a bad day and just can't take anymore if I can just stop and focus for one minute on her then I'm better. Maybe not 100% but I can breathe again. Just knowing she's there at the end of the worst day makes things so much better. Again it's like even when I get stressed out and worked up if I can just think about her and us I can make it through anything.

Happy Anniversary, baby. Thank you for the best 8 years of my life.

Yet another reason I love her....

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Reason number 3,653,891 why I love R:

When I get a new haircut that involves more than my normal wash and go I can always get her to brandish the curling iron on the back of my head.

Of course the fact that I can steal her shoes far outweighs any hair doing abilities she may have. And her boobs.

And of course if she wanted to hire a maid or take me here I would forever absolve her of having to do my hair.

Forever meaning until tomorrow.

Isn't love grand?

The Couples Meme

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Figured I might as well jump on the bandwagon....

1. How long have you been together? a little over 7 1/2 years.

2. Who pursued who? I think it was a mutual thing. We started out as just friends because neither of us were looking for more. And then the feelings were there and I think we were both pretty powerless to do anything other than give in to them.

3. Do you wear any type of wedding/commitment ring? R proposed with a beautiful ring in January 2002. She wears a titanium band.

4. What was the hardest thing about learning to live together? Honestly, I don't remember any issues coming about when we began living together.

5. Who takes longer to get ready in the morning? Are we talking as a whole or on individual aspects? I take waaay longer on make-up & clothes. She takes waaay longer on hair.

6. Do you usually eat breakfast together? Only on weekends.

7. Do you ever share clothes? Nope. She's tiny & I'm not. I do however "borrow" her shoes.

8. Who does most of the cooking? She does on weeknights because she gets home an hour & a half before I do. We usually share the responsibilities on weekends.

9. Who usually takes out the trash? I take it out occasionally. But, I forget more often than not.

10. If you have pets, who usually does litter box or poop patrol? Not me. I occasionally help but for some reason when I do it it becomes a two person job whereas when R does she can do it alone with no help. Wonder what that says about me?

11. Which one of you is more likely to answer the phone when it rings? Me. R never answers the phone unless I'm not home and she recognizes the number on caller ID.

12. Who’s in charge of the remote if you’re watching TV together? Me. R doesn't like TV that much.

13. Who usually drives when you go out together? We usually trade off. Unless we're driving in Memphis & then it's all me.

14. Which one of you takes care of spiders and bugs that get into the house? Not me. I've killed a spider or two out of sheer necessity but I'd much rather R take care of them. Grasshoppers are a whole different story. I will sooner lock myself in a closet than go near a grasshopper to kill it.

15. Facing the bed, who sleeps on which side? We both sleep on the left according to R. A more accurate representation puts her on the left and me in the middle or wherever the dog lets me sleep.

16. Who usually checks the (postal) mailbox? I guess R. I never remember (or care) to get it.

17. If something breaks or goes wrong in the house, which one of you is more likely to either fix it or call someone to fix it? We're both likely to try our hands at fixing it before calling someone unless it's something totally beyond our capabilities. I'm more likely to call the repair person.

18. Who is generally the neater of you? Probably me.

19. Who handles the checkbook/pays the bills? Totally me. This is the year of debt reduction & I am the debt natzi.

20. What was your last fight/disagreement about? It was last week. We were both tired & stressed (still are) due to normal life things & the whole storm damage shit & we got snippy with each other.

21. When you slow dance together, who leads? She does as she's like 4" taller than me.

22. What do you love the most about your other half? She's the most caring person I've ever met. And she puts up with my shit!

A good one

Friday, February 01, 2008

Yesterday was a pretty damn good. Which we've needed around our house due to some crummy occurrences which include the sleet last Friday which caused a horrendous commute home and the wind Tuesday that shattered our brand new patio table.

So what's so good?

I got a bonus. Which in and of itself is awesome. But. The bonus? It's about three times bigger than I anticipated. Which is even better. Combined with the raise I got a few weeks ago? So fucking awesome I'm dancing.

Now I just have to convince R that we are not under any circumstances spending the money on an alpaca or a fainting goat.

Our story

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

When R and I first met I was only a week past my 20th birthday. R, 28, had sworn off women any younger than 25. We met -wait for the cliché-online in 2000. My girlfriend and I had just split up two weeks earlier and I had just moved to a somewhat strange town an hour from my hometown with no friends nearby. So I was on AOL (this was 8 years ago--we've grown so much since then) and I just looked up any lesbians in Arkansas online at that moment. Lo and behold there she was. Her profile sounded interesting so I IMed her. We were both just out of long-term relationships and neither of us were looking for anything other than a friend.

We talked. A lot. Like every day. Multiple times a day. At just about any opportunity we could get. I thought she was the funniest person I had ever spoken to (still do) and she thought I was pretty hilarious as well. We eventually graduated to talking on the phone. Months passed. Feelings developed and grew. We decided to meet. Did I mention we lived 2 1/2 hours apart?

So Labor Day weekend 2000 R came for a visit. It pretty much solidified and intensified all the feelings we had developed for one another. She came down on Saturday and had planned to leave the next day. She stayed until Monday.

Things went really well until November. Then R got spooked. She was just out of an on again off again long-term relationship. I was 20. Things were going really, really well. So she ran.

And I said, "you'll be back." Wasn't I just a cocky little shit?

So she ran. And I did what any 20 year old would do. I partied. I went to Memphis and hung out with my ex, old friends, new friends. I partied my ass off. I usually rolled in around 7am. Slept all day and then started again round about 5pm. This went on for over a week.

Some of my new friends started staying the night at my apartment. Nothing ever happened. I wasn't interested in any of them. I only wanted R. But, she was off partying herself.

Did I mention we still talked? I had to make sure she knew I was living it up. A little petty, yes. But, I needed her to know I wasn't sitting at home moping.

Then comes the night that she found out that these new friends were staying the night at my place. Can we say eruption? R lost her shit. I advised her that since we weren't together she had no right to inquire as to who was or wasn't at my place.

Needless to say my prediction came true and we were back together within days.

Looking back I can't believe how silly and immature we were. I also can't believe how cocky I was. Because that is nothing like me. I never act that way. I guess drastic times call for drastic measures. And they paid off.

We did the long distance thing for a little over a year and a half. Then in 2002 we bought a house together a town over from where she had been living. And I left behind that horrid little town I had been living in.

And here we are now. Our 8th anniversary is coming up this year. And when I think of how we met, the split, the age difference and the long distance thing, I'm pretty amazed that we made it through with so little bumps. I think the odds were against us. I think if we had done the traditional U-Haul cliché we would have had a much harder time. But, we beat the odds and shocked quite a few friends. And ourselves.

And I couldn't be happier with us.

Too much?

Thursday, January 10, 2008

I have been told that R & I have a weird relationship.

It's probably not what you're thinking.

We have actually had people express their disbelief at how nice and considerate we are to one another.

I remember a time when we were staying at a cabin with two other couples and we were in the bathroom getting ready to go out and I put toothpaste on R's toothbrush, handed it to her and then made my own. One of the other women standing in the bathroom with us just stood there with this shocked look on her face and said, "you fix each other's toothbrushes?" Is that really so shocking?

R was talking to one of her coworkers and she mentioned making my lunch. Her coworker stopped cold and said, "you make her lunch?" The woman was shocked that R makes my lunch for me. Comments like that are pretty frequent.

We're not super lovey dovey 24/7 and we can still be complete asses to one another on occasion. Ok, usually it's just me being an ass; but R has her moments too.

But, we do try to do nice things for one another; even if it's just the little things. R has a bad day so I go pick up the sushi she has been craving for days. Or R will take over Ryley duty while I chill out when I come home fried.

Is it really so weird for us to do nice things for one another?