Wednesday, October 17, 2007

I have had numerous people call me an "old soul."

I guess I shouldn't be very surprised that I am different from most people my age. I always have been. I always gravitated towards older people because of their maturity. I had the hardest time getting along with people my age. I thought they were morons for the most part.

When people meet me they think I am so centered and so not what a twenty-seven year old should be. When I try to explain that I've already been there, done that they tend to not believe me. This usually prompts me to begin listing some of the crazy things I did when I was very young. Such as:

  • hanging out in bars at 12
  • attending frat parties at 14
  • the tattoo at 16
  • being led through an airport in shackles and chains at 17
  • the drinking (Oh Lord, the drinking!)
You can't even imagine the shock on people's faces when I start telling them all of the things I did before my 18th birthday.

I've done it all and I did it way before anyone else at my age. Maybe that's why I'm not like the stereotypical Gen-Yer--I'm a few stages beyond them. I don't know if this is because I'm an "old soul." But, I sure don't mind thinking of myself this way.

Yeah so I lied...

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

The title of this blog is somewhat misleading. I am fat and I am a lesbian and I do sometimes have adventures. However, my life isn't full of them. My existence is pretty normal. Although being gay in Arkansas can be an adventure. A very scary adventure. Filled with men named Bubba who drive around in pickups wearing overalls and shirts that are too short for their beer bellies* and who would love to show you what you're missing. Show you a "real" man.

But, I digress, which I will probably do a lot of here. I have a tendency to ramble on and on. Occasionally I'll look over and my wife will just be sitting there with this confused look on her face. I like to confuse her. It keeps her on her toes. But back to the purpose of this post:

There is no spoon. Wait. I mean there is no purpose. And if you're reading this looking for some deep purpose (or hell, even comic relief) you probably won't get it. I have no purpose. Well, unless you ask the religious right and they will say my purpose is to convert people. Now why in the hell would I want to convert anyone? They stopped giving out toasters for conversions years ago.

Seriously though. There is no purpose at least as of right now. There may never be one. My hope is that this blog will become some kind of creative outlet for me. And I hope that if someone stops by I can at least get a smirk out of them.

*No rednecks were harmed in the making of this visualization. No, seriously. I may make fun of rednecks and some of the other various species of people here in Arkansas or in the world in general, but I do it with love. Heh. Really, I can make fun of certain people (like rednecks) because I have either dated them (when I was delusionally straight) or I am related to them or I have had enough dealings with them to make myself an expert on them.