Day 3

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Today's post is brought to you by the letter R as in R wrote this post as I have no time because I am so swamped at work I don't even have time to pee.

On with the show:

Sweet Jesus, when will this end? Day 3 of the diet you get to eat soup (kill me now), fruit and veggies. Wee! All the veggies you want for breakfast. Because nothing says, “Good morning, world!” like a big plate of steamed broccoli for breakfast. Also, nothing says, “I’ll be in here for another 10 minutes or so,” like a big plate of steamed broccoli for breakfast.

I skipped breakfast and had a nice glass of grape juice instead. Jen took a big bag of broccoli to steam for lunch and I *sob* took a bowl of soup. I didn’t have a choice really. You’ve smelled broccoli cooking? Yeah, I couldn’t do that to the office. And really the soup isn’t bad. I mean it would be better if it were Rally’s cheeseburgers and fries but that’s what got my ass into this position. Damn you Rally’s. Damn you and your beautiful fries!

She’s mentioned the odd cleansing properties of the soup? Yeah, my office loves me. Yet somehow in my burger deprived mind that seemed a better choice than the steamy sulfur smell of broccoli. I was okay most of the day till one girl came around with the freaking canister of M&M’s asking me if I wanted some. In a soup fueled frenzy it was all I could do not to beat her over the head with a stapler and steal them, running off into the field behind the office cackling madly. But I was strong and said no. I even waited till she left my office before I started crying.

Supper was a nice big bowl of soup. Oh joy! Oh bliss! Oh hell. ‘Eat soup’ is now a perfectly acceptable insult in our house. Example: “Snakes on a Plane is stupid. I can’t believe you like this.” “Eat soup.”

Jennifer again. As you can see this diet is making us slightly delusional. My total weight lost end of day 3 is 5.5lbs. Yeah up 1.5 lbs.

This is exactly what happened to our friend that turned us on to the diet. She gained weight on the 3rd day. She quit. A true friend would have warned us when it happened but nooooo. Doesn't matter now though; we're toughing this out until the end. 4 more days to go. *sob*