Family Dynamics

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

So I was planning a post on how I finally decided between non action, grad school and law school but as I sat drafting the post in the bathroom (yes, I think of posts while I pee; it's the only time I have to think about things other than work) I started with, "My parents came up from Memphis the day I had surgery." But then I had to clarify the term parents. Parents in general to me include my mother, my mother's best friend and my stepdad. In this case I am referring to my mother and her best friend who I will call Kaye.

Kaye has been in our life since I was 6 years old. She and my Mom met at work and became friends. We all came to live together when she called my Mom in the middle of the night and said she was leaving her husband could my Mom please come get her. My Mom showed up to find Kaye drunk off her ass walking down the road with two suitcases.

She was going to stay with us for a little while. Just until she could get on her feet and get her own place. However, my Mom came to like only having to pay half the bills. She was a single mother working three jobs with no child support from my dead beat father. So Kaye stayed on. We eventually moved to the suburbs where we rented a house for a few years and then proceeded to buy a new one. It was the perfect situation for both of them. Kaye is originally from up North and had no family close by. We became a happy family. My Mom's family accepted her immediately and Kaye soon become just another one of my grandmother's kids. Up until the day she died my grandmother swore she had 6 kids and 1 adopted kid.

We all lived together in the suburbs until I moved away to attend college. Two months later my Mom married my stepdad and they bought a house in a different suburb.

It wasn't until my Mom married my stepdad that people started making comments about how they were sure my Mom and Kaye were a couple when they lived together. I was totally blown away by this the first time I heard it. My Mom and Kaye were best friends and nothing more. It never occurred to me that they were more than friends. Even when I finally admitted to myself that I was a lesbian it never crossed my mind that they could be a couple or that anyone could ever think they were more than friends. My Mom dated on a regular basis. Hell, Kaye even dated my uncle for a year or so. So to hear that so many thought they were together was insane to me. Still to this day it blows my mind that people thought that.

Kaye has been in my life for 22 years. She is my other mother. There is no doubt about that in my mind. When Mother's Day comes around I buy gifts for BOTH of my mothers.

So while technically I was raised in a single parent household, I really had two parents. And I was (and still am) damn lucky that I had the best mothers ever.

RIP Quincy, 1980-2008

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

I've been too busy to post as I've been mourning the loss of a dear loved one, Quincy. Quincy and I have been together all my life. We've shared joy; we've shared pain. And while I basically ignored him my whole life, good ole' Quincy was always there for me.

That is until last Wednesday night, when he decided that it would be fun to try and kill me. Or at least make me feel like I was dying. Yes, Quincy, my life-long companion attacked me early last Wednesday evening. Unfortunately, I had no idea where the attack was coming from so I ended up in the ER about 9:00 p.m. Wednesday night. What felt like chest pain was actually Quincy and his damn stones. Or to be more accurate, one of Quncy's minions (aka a gallstone) stuck in my bile duct.

I stayed in the hospital overnight and the next morning I met with a hitman (aka my surgeon). I gave the kill order that morning and by mid afternoon Quincy was no more. I was left with 23 staples, percocet, and wall paper paste (aka mashed potatoes)

There was a scare after surgery that Quincy had in fact gotten the last laugh as my bile duct wasn't flushing and my liver function was high on two tests. I was released Friday afternoon and I've been home since recuperating. Today I learned that Quincy's last attempt at causing me pain did indeed fail. My liver function is back to normal and I'm set to return to work Monday.

So here's to you Quincy; you useless organ. I hope the incinerator burned your ass very slowly.

Yours in Christ,

Jennifer

Swoon

Friday, September 12, 2008

Saw this for the 1st time over at Syd's. All I have to say is swoon! I love Gina Gershon and I love videos mocking Palin so really nothing could be better than this video. Except for the fact that Gina Gershon is in a bikini at the end. Did I mention the swooning?

See more Gina Gershon videos at Funny or Die

The very best

Thursday, September 11, 2008

I've been so busy and stressed that I haven't really had time to sit down and write the post I've had in the back of my head for a while.

Over Labor Day weekend R & I celebrated our 8th anniversary. 8 wonderful years.

Before R & I got together I've never had a relationship last more than a year (2 years if you can count the on and off periods). I honestly thought long term relationships weren't for me as I couldn't understand how you could be with the same person for so long and not get bored. I used to be a very fickle person and that bad personality trait always seemed to manifest itself in my relationships. And then I met R. And let me say WOW.

I haven't had a fickle moment since I met her. I never had those doubts. I never looked just to keep my options open. I never sat and wondered if there was someone else out there who was better for me. I guess I instinctively knew that there wasn't someone better. I finally found the right one. I finally found the one person I was meant to be with. I could stop looking and worrying and just breathe.

Everything in my relationship with R is so completely and totally different than every other relationship I have ever had. Not only do I love R; I truly like her. I like being with her and around her and I enjoy all the time we spend together. Sometimes we stop and ask each other if we're normal in our need and want to spend all our time together. We look at other couples and don't see that. We don't go out with our friends separately. Not because the other would get mad or upset but because we WANT to be with each other. We don't do things separately very often. If one of us needs alone time or space we just retreat a bit; to another room, to a separate activity, etc. Yes, sometimes we wonder if we're normal but really neither of us mind.

She's my best friend. Whenever I have a bad day and just can't take anymore if I can just stop and focus for one minute on her then I'm better. Maybe not 100% but I can breathe again. Just knowing she's there at the end of the worst day makes things so much better. Again it's like even when I get stressed out and worked up if I can just think about her and us I can make it through anything.

Happy Anniversary, baby. Thank you for the best 8 years of my life.

Love it!

Thursday, September 04, 2008

This display of clips showcasing Republicans' back and forth take on sexism and female candidates is fucking priceless.



I <3 Jon Stewart.

Holy shit

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Can someone please explain to me how this is a good idea? I cannot fathom how someone got the balls to bring this resolution up for a vote let alone the fact that the damn school board voted unanimously to allow teachers to carry GUNS TO SCHOOL!

Wow is pretty much all I can say. Because we all know that no teacher would ever screw up and leave their gun unattended or hell even if they're carrying it on them at all times aren't they just giving some pissed off kid easy access to a gun? How hard would it be for some high school kid to overpower an adult? Not that hard.

The fact that the parents didn't object to this amazes me.

I'm pretty much speechless.

Tequila

Monday, August 18, 2008

I would like to propose a new law. It involves tequila and food. Or better yet tequila and a lack of food. I think before any waiter or waitress serves someone tequila they should also inquire as to the last time that person ate. It would prevent many headaches and a whole lot of embarrassment. Although it did provide much enjoyment for me the next day when I was reminded of all the wonderful things I did & said the night before.

• Apparently I threatened to sue Sonic for false advertising.

• I was also extremely upset by the fact that Sonic had the instructions on how to make drinks and blasts on the outside of the drive-thru window. (they didn't)

• I also forgot how to say cake in Spanish so instead I listed off all the ingredients in hopes that they would be able to understand what I was asking for. However, I could only remember two ingredients so instead I kept asking for milk and eggs. And since I couldn't think of how to say flour I instead kept asking for pan (aka bread).

Tequila=many laughs for the sober ones